To guys and girls who are in "the dating game,"
please, for Pete's sake, start respecting yourself!
If you care about a person, and you try to treat them right, but then you see their true colors,
please, show a little self respect and do not keep chasing after that person! (This goes especially for the girls.)
I don't care how much you love him! Girls should never have to chase a guy! He should be chasing you! And if he's too big of a douche to do that, then you really are better off!
"But I just miss him so much. I miss the sweet texts he sent me, and him saying he loves me, and someone to talk to, and how he used to hold me and kiss me."
Well, honey, if that's the case, it sounds like to me you loved the idea of you and him more than really loving him.
There are some things that should be deal breakers. If you can ignore a whole list of them, that's not a healthy relationship.
If he chooses something or someone else over you, then
YOU HAVE TO LET HIM GO.
Yeah, it hurts. You may feel like your dying a little on the inside.
You've had your heart set on being with this person.
You've given everything to this relationship to keep it going-maybe for a long time.
And now everything you've fought for is gone. All the promises that were made mean nothing. And you're back to square one.
Right now, there may be no one that understands you like that person, but you still have to let go.
Fight for what you love, but when what you love gives you up, you're just degrading yourself. Let him/her go. No one who gives up on you is worth it.
I know it's completely cliche to say, "Oh, don't worry. There are other fish in the sea. You'll find someone better!"
I mean who am I to say that there is someone better? The truth is no one knows.
Odds are in your favor that out of the 5,999,999,998 other people on this planet beside you and him/her you WILL find someone else who is more appropriate for you. But really who knows for certain?
I mean you're a beautiful, attractive girl/guy with qualities that deserve to be cherished and never let go. But who am I to say that you will find someone that puts you first that you can love as much as they love you?
NO ONE KNOWS FOR CERTAIN.
You honestly may never love someone as much as you do this person. (It's highly unlikely, but possible.) But you have to let them go anyways. I know it hurts, but it's part of life.
Love.
Betrayal.
Loss.
Pain.
Everyone experiences loss.
But you're strong enough to get through it. You don't need a significant other's help. You can make it on your own.
You will almost definitely find someone else. And if you don't, you're still better off without someone who doesn't put you first.
A boyfriend or girlfriend is not everything.
Find something else to devote your life and love to.
Everybody needs a purpose.
Don't let some skanky ho or some idiot douchbag be your sole purpose.
Be a person by yourself!
Have friends.
Spend time with your family.
Flirt your freaking tail off!
Just have fun being you.
Anyone who under-appreciates your value can take a flying leap.
Stand up for who you are, and don't let anyone bring you down.
Cause guess what! You're awesome. Whether that person tells you so or not.
Move on with your life.
Stop degrading yourself.
Have some self-respect.
You deserve better.
•Matthew 5:4
•1 Samuel 12:22
RESPECT
True Colors
Tuesday, January 15, 2013
Sunday, January 13, 2013
So Much for My Happy Ending
Well isn't this a funny little twist....ohh nothing happens like the movies.
Listen up, girls.
There are no prince charmings.
There are no glass slippers.
He will not risk life and limb to save you. In fact, he won't even give up any time for you.
You might as well accept it now and take it as a life lesson because nobody cares about anybody anymore, and if they do, it's just a season. It'll pass as soon as they stop being useful.
So get up off your butt.
Wipe away your tears,
and be happy by yourself.
You can always do better. You don't need a prince or a fairy godmother to help you. It's time to get up and help yourself.
Listen up, girls.
There are no prince charmings.
There are no glass slippers.
He will not risk life and limb to save you. In fact, he won't even give up any time for you.
You might as well accept it now and take it as a life lesson because nobody cares about anybody anymore, and if they do, it's just a season. It'll pass as soon as they stop being useful.
So get up off your butt.
Wipe away your tears,
and be happy by yourself.
You can always do better. You don't need a prince or a fairy godmother to help you. It's time to get up and help yourself.
Saturday, November 24, 2012
What Is Love??
So... How do you know if you're "in love"?
And I mean the real let's-get-married-and-become-old-people kind of love.
Not this oh-we-should-bang "love" that people seem to care so much about these days. Nope. I mean real legitimate love. Like the kind people used to have back in the day when folks talked to each other, you know, like face to face. No. Not "facetime." FACE TO FACE. There's a difference.
Well, before I get started I would just like to say that technology has nearly extinguished chivalry and true romance. Forgive me, but hearing about how your "bf" first text you "ily" is just not as inspirational as hearing about how your great-grandfather courted your great-grandmother. (For those that don't know, courting is this thing people used to do where the guy actually left his house and went to the girl's house and sat down and talked to her and her parents and got to know them. Scary, I know.) ANYways, moving on...
There are four simple steps to tell if you are truly in love with another person. HOWEVER! I must stress, just because YOUR love is true and follows these steps does NOT mean the object of your affection has the same true love for you. The trick is to find someone who loves you as truly and equally as you love them. ALSO, love Jesus first. If you both love Him, THEN apply these steps and you'll both be fine and dandy. (:
So on to step one. Love begins with...
1. Physical Attraction
Now, I know we all say, "I'm not into just looks!" And this may be true, but in MOST cases the first thing we notice about the people we come to love is their physical attributes. But true love doesn't stop there... (Also, there is an exception to this one step. In a few special circumstance, people have been known to fall in love with someone they were not initially attracted to physically. If this is true for you, skip this step and continue to step two.)
2. Emotional Attachment
Of course we all know, when we begin to fall in love there is a HUGE emotional attachment to that special someone. When they hurt, you hurt. When they laugh, you laugh. When they play video games for three hours and don't text you back, you BLOW THEM UP.......oh wait, no, that one just applies to me. LOL. Anywho, you get the point. Unfortunately, this step is usually where people STOP. But this is not the end. We've just gotten to the "puppy love" stage. Remember love is not all fun and games and unicorn's rainbow farts. No. There is much more to come...
So to step three!
3. The Sudden (and continued*) Realization
Here's a news flash for you. Whoever you think you love, THEY ARE NOT PERFECT! In fact they probably suck. They have just as many flaws as you do and maybe more. They will NEVER be everything you wanted the love of your life to be. They will NEVER say everything you think they should say or do everything you think they should do. And if you think they are perfect, JUST WAIT. You will eventually see that they have flaws as well. The sad thing about this stage is that most couple do not make it past step two. Here's an example:
This step comes for EVERY couple.
If your's hasn't come yet, please, please, PLEASE, do not get married to this person until you have your sudden realization.
*Please note the word continued in step three. Yes, it's what you're thinking. It gets worse. The flaws you see when you're dating will double or triple when you are married. And once again, no, the person didn't change. It is a never-ending process of you learning about this person. The closer you get the more flaws you will see. We're all human, folks
And finally step four:
4. The BIG Decision
Now it's time to see if your love is true. You have finally seen the flaws. You've gotten down to the nasty, gooey, puss-filled, center of his/her rotten heart. (Okay, maybe not that bad.) Now ask yourself. ARE THEY WORTH IT?? Is it worth your time to be with this person and put up with their nasty stinking feet, or their bad attitude, or their nicotene habit? If the answer is yes, and you can accept all their flaws and love them in spite of it, then *drum roll* Dum-Da-Da-Da! You're In LOVE!!! Lucky you! You care enough about an individual to deal with ALL their dirty laundry! (; If the answer is no, and you realize that the flaws are too bad and that you need to find someone with a different set of flaws that you can better deal with, then Bum-Bum-Bum...You Are Not In Love! Maybe you and this person can still be friends especially if you still care about them. Just be careful with the friends option because if they love you regardless of your flaws then it will be MUCH harder for them to be "just friends" with you. So now you know! Test your love against these four steps to know for sure that your love is true.(; Just remember, they have to love you as equally as you love them for your relationship to be a success. Few things hurt worse than love unrequited.
Also never forget.......
And I mean the real let's-get-married-and-become-old-people kind of love.
Not this oh-we-should-bang "love" that people seem to care so much about these days. Nope. I mean real legitimate love. Like the kind people used to have back in the day when folks talked to each other, you know, like face to face. No. Not "facetime." FACE TO FACE. There's a difference.
Well, before I get started I would just like to say that technology has nearly extinguished chivalry and true romance. Forgive me, but hearing about how your "bf" first text you "ily" is just not as inspirational as hearing about how your great-grandfather courted your great-grandmother. (For those that don't know, courting is this thing people used to do where the guy actually left his house and went to the girl's house and sat down and talked to her and her parents and got to know them. Scary, I know.) ANYways, moving on...
There are four simple steps to tell if you are truly in love with another person. HOWEVER! I must stress, just because YOUR love is true and follows these steps does NOT mean the object of your affection has the same true love for you. The trick is to find someone who loves you as truly and equally as you love them. ALSO, love Jesus first. If you both love Him, THEN apply these steps and you'll both be fine and dandy. (:
So on to step one. Love begins with...
1. Physical Attraction
Now, I know we all say, "I'm not into just looks!" And this may be true, but in MOST cases the first thing we notice about the people we come to love is their physical attributes. But true love doesn't stop there... (Also, there is an exception to this one step. In a few special circumstance, people have been known to fall in love with someone they were not initially attracted to physically. If this is true for you, skip this step and continue to step two.)
2. Emotional Attachment
Of course we all know, when we begin to fall in love there is a HUGE emotional attachment to that special someone. When they hurt, you hurt. When they laugh, you laugh. When they play video games for three hours and don't text you back, you BLOW THEM UP.......oh wait, no, that one just applies to me. LOL. Anywho, you get the point. Unfortunately, this step is usually where people STOP. But this is not the end. We've just gotten to the "puppy love" stage. Remember love is not all fun and games and unicorn's rainbow farts. No. There is much more to come...
So to step three!
3. The Sudden (and continued*) Realization
Here's a news flash for you. Whoever you think you love, THEY ARE NOT PERFECT! In fact they probably suck. They have just as many flaws as you do and maybe more. They will NEVER be everything you wanted the love of your life to be. They will NEVER say everything you think they should say or do everything you think they should do. And if you think they are perfect, JUST WAIT. You will eventually see that they have flaws as well. The sad thing about this stage is that most couple do not make it past step two. Here's an example:
- Jane and Joe meet.
- Jane thinks Joe is adorable! Joe thinks Jane is fine! (step 1)
- They begin a relationship and become emotionally attached to each other. (What most people call "falling in love.") (step 2)
- They become so emotionally attached that they think they are "in love." Then they start to see the flaws... Jane says something hurtful, or Joe reveals a bad habit he has, or Jane stops treating Joe properly. Jane tells Joe, "Joe you aren't the guy you were when we first started dating. You've changed! What happened to you?" (step 3)
This step comes for EVERY couple.
If your's hasn't come yet, please, please, PLEASE, do not get married to this person until you have your sudden realization.
*Please note the word continued in step three. Yes, it's what you're thinking. It gets worse. The flaws you see when you're dating will double or triple when you are married. And once again, no, the person didn't change. It is a never-ending process of you learning about this person. The closer you get the more flaws you will see. We're all human, folks
And finally step four:
4. The BIG Decision
Now it's time to see if your love is true. You have finally seen the flaws. You've gotten down to the nasty, gooey, puss-filled, center of his/her rotten heart. (Okay, maybe not that bad.) Now ask yourself. ARE THEY WORTH IT?? Is it worth your time to be with this person and put up with their nasty stinking feet, or their bad attitude, or their nicotene habit? If the answer is yes, and you can accept all their flaws and love them in spite of it, then *drum roll* Dum-Da-Da-Da! You're In LOVE!!! Lucky you! You care enough about an individual to deal with ALL their dirty laundry! (; If the answer is no, and you realize that the flaws are too bad and that you need to find someone with a different set of flaws that you can better deal with, then Bum-Bum-Bum...You Are Not In Love! Maybe you and this person can still be friends especially if you still care about them. Just be careful with the friends option because if they love you regardless of your flaws then it will be MUCH harder for them to be "just friends" with you. So now you know! Test your love against these four steps to know for sure that your love is true.(; Just remember, they have to love you as equally as you love them for your relationship to be a success. Few things hurt worse than love unrequited.
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